The Road Less Traveled! Are you Okay? How I broke free from eating disorders, addiction, and suicidal ideation. A story of one's struggle and will to die, versus God's will for health and happiness.
Friday, June 26, 2026
FACES OF ANOREXIA, BULIMIA, ADDICTION, and SUCIDIAL IDEATION! SOCIAL MEDIA IS A LIE! GET HELP TODAY!
The Road Less Traveled! Who's will are you following on your road to recovery?
To sustain recovery, your mind, body, and spirit must be connected. Reflecting on how I found peace and contentment in my life, I remembered the notes I wrote in my journal at age twenty: “Mindfulness teaches us to protect our mental and physical well-being by connecting all aspects of our mind, body, and spirit.” When these three areas are balanced, it becomes clearer that we have three paths to choose from throughout our lifetime. We can follow our free will, the will of Satan, who seeks to destroy us when we are weak, or the will of God. My testimony describes what it was like to follow each of these paths when I fell prey to addiction and eating disorders. God’s presence in my life helped me realize that following The Road Less Traveled meant I would never suffer alone. Above all, I felt a pure, unconditional love in my heart.
The question that runs through Christianity is: “Whose will are you following on your path to recovery?” As you read my story, woven through the pages of this workbook, you'll see that the road to self and Satan nearly destroyed me. When I was weak and ready to give up, Satan took control of my mind, body, and spirit. He encouraged my self-destructive behavior, dug a hole, and buried me in dirt. This can happen to anyone because when we follow our own free will or Satan’s, we limit our ability to see what we are truly capable of as human beings. However, as I grew closer to God, He strengthened me to silence the voices fueling my depression and anxiety and guided me toward the suggested reading materials throughout this workbook. God pulled back the curtains over my eyes to reveal that worldly distractions were interfering with my recovery and our relationship. He also taught me that maintaining good health is vital to fulfilling the purpose He has for us. The Road Less Traveled opened my mind and heart to making better decisions at crossroads. Seeing the positive results of my choices, I realized that whether others understood me no longer mattered. What mattered most was that God understood me more deeply than anyone else! The Road Less Traveled may not be easy; however, it’s a path toward freedom from shame, guilt, and anger.
“Patience is the fruit of the spirit that only grows
through trials.”
Joyce
Meyer
Compassion dissolves the chains of shame and doubt that tie us to unhealthy patterns of behavior!
Sharing my struggles with eating disorders and addiction, I felt like I was doing a live autopsy. However, to be reborn and start living, you must understand why you feel like you are dying, create a plan, and stick to it. So, you can start living. Being trapped with an eating disorder or addiction is like living in hell. Hell is like looking at your life and at who you could’ve been, and realizing you’re not that person. This perspective drove me to research the genetic link to learn more about my family’s mental health history. After studying various psychiatric conditions for more than thirty years, I was saddened to realize that my family rarely discussed their mental health or sought help, which led to a century of depression, unresolved anxiety, eating disorders, and addiction. Reflecting on this, I often wonder whether proper treatment might have changed their experiences, possibly preventing the divorce epidemic of the 1990s, when 4.7 divorces per 1,000 people occurred, compared with 2.4 in 2022. Would earlier intervention have lessened my own suicidal thoughts as a teenager? I can't help but think that previous generations in my family turned to unhealthy coping mechanisms to handle their anxiety and depression because of inadequate or unavailable treatment. But God always knows what we need. When we suffer, He gives us the gift of compassion. Recognizing this and offering one another genuine care can help us break old patterns of feeling unworthy. Compassion allows our hearts to heal authentically, dissolving the chains of shame and doubt that tie us to unhealthy patterns of behavior.
70 MILLION PEOPLE WORLWIDE HAVE BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH AN EATING DISORDER! What is your why?
As I researched the topics in this workbook further, I found a sobering fact: approximately 30 million people in the US and 70 million worldwide have been diagnosed with an eating disorder. This suggests that these issues affect a significant portion of the global population. Shockingly, half of Americans are connected to someone fighting an eating disorder, yet only a few thousand doctors are trained to treat them. When I think about families, friends, clinicians, teachers, and spiritual leaders, I realize that almost every household could benefit from the resources in this workbook. As you prepare for the challenging journey ahead, ask yourself, “WHY is recovery important to me right now?” and “What is your WHY or reason for reading this workbook?” Your answers can significantly influence your ability to understand and overcome your struggle with an eating disorder or addiction. Your responses will guide you through the workbook's topics and highlight the importance of self-reflection throughout your healing process. This self-reflection isn’t a burden, but a powerful tool that puts you in control of your journey and empowers you to take steps toward recovery.
To grow and achieve your goals, you need to do what's uncomfortable in recovery. This workbook is designed to challenge your thinking and daily decisions, helping you rebuild your self-worth and self-esteem. You will learn to communicate your feelings more effectively, enabling you to approach your treatment plan with greater confidence. You will learn to advocate for yourself, whether you’re currently in treatment or seeking it. By design, this workbook is most effective when used alongside a therapist specializing in eating disorders and addiction. It aims to help you recover more quickly by addressing difficult questions now so you can regain control over your future. Your answers may also reveal why previous treatment programs haven’t led to a successful recovery, so you can avoid them in the future. The other half of this workbook includes resources and websites to help you and your family access the appropriate care needed to heal and live a meaningful life beyond addiction and eating disorders. This information is not intended to replace therapy, medications, diagnose or treat conditions, or discourage you from consulting your doctor.
Thursday, June 25, 2026
Are you Okay? How does self-compassion and forgiveness play a role in discovering your purpose?
On the cover of my workbook, I was at the peak of my career as an actress and model, having completed 20 films in just over 2 years. However, I longed to be wanted and understood for more than my body. The activities I once loved, and that brought me joy, were taken from my life as I became obsessed with food and exercise. Although I was eager to work on films that told meaningful stories, I had to decide whether being a starving artist was worth it. To be relevant, being a starving artist meant two things: no money and my body being used against me. Then came the Jeffrey Epsteins of the entertainment industry. Sex, drugs, and casting couches were everyday occurrences. Almost everyone had a price. If you didn’t sell your soul to make it big, your self-esteem suffered from constant rejection at auditions. As I struggled to accept yet another failed attempt to pursue a career that interested me, I fell into severe depression and experienced my worst relapse to date. As my memory started to fade, because of debilitating pain associated with Scleroderma and fibromyalgia, I returned to therapy to work through every unhealthy relationship that was robbing me of seeing the beauty within myself and the world around me. I wanted to understand why I was so self-destructive. I needed to know why my suicidal thoughts seemed to resurface when life became stressful. I also wanted to understand why I sabotaged every opportunity in my life. Even then, I was relentless about asking others twenty years later, “Are you OK?!”
As
I continued my journey to recovery, I realized that the compassion I showed to
strangers was something I had never extended to myself. I wondered if I had
known then what I know now, would I have fallen prey to the opioid epidemic at
the hands of doctors? Or would I have chosen a different way to relieve my
physical and emotional pain? What if I wasn’t given Narcan to reverse the
overdose? Would I still be here to share my story? No matter the choices I’ve
made in my weakened state of mind, only God can help me forgive the medical
profession for failing me, as I recall the conversations I overheard while
lying in a hospital bed, clinging to life. Because, as depressed as I was, and
despite my desire to end my life, I truly wanted help. But I was drowning—drowning
from the loss, the pain, the tragedies, the lies, and a former life I no longer
remembered as my memory began to fade. That is, until I found my purpose and my
reason to live! I now have a daughter, a story, and a vision to help families communicate more effectively and seek treatment to overcome their personal struggles.
Wednesday, June 24, 2026
"You're the strongest person I know!" and BLACK BOX WARNING...
The cover of my workbook, coming out later this year, features someone many people would not expect to represent the face of suicide. Most people who know me say, “You’re the strongest person I know.” However, what began as an innocent diet at age twelve caused chaos in my life and in the lives of those who loved me for over forty years. My struggle with anorexia, bulimia, addiction, and multiple attempts to end my life was driven by many factors I discuss throughout this workbook, including inadequate treatment, broken relationships, low self-esteem, the entertainment industry, genetics, physical and emotional pain, and the debilitating side effects of medications. In this workbook, you will have the chance to explore each of these topics. I share these experiences not to focus on the past but to help you see that you are not alone in your struggles. We can share these experiences and overcome them together, knowing others have walked a similar path and come out stronger, which can bring comfort and hope on your recovery journey.
For over 40 years, only one doctor
explained what a black-box warning meant. But that wasn’t until I was lying in
bed, unable to move my legs because of a reaction to the antibiotic
Ciprofloxacin. That reaction led me to quietly research every medication I have
been on since puberty. It took me many years of trial and error with different
medications to realize that several different medications were fueling my
suicidal thoughts and self-destructive behaviors. You will have the opportunity
to dive deeper into how your medications have made you feel, so you can avoid
the potential side effect of suicidal thoughts that might have been overlooked
in the past. Don’t assume your doctor has the answers. You hold the answers to
the root of your suffering, which will be revealed in your answers in this
workbook.
So, what is a BLACK BOX
WARNING? It alerts clients, doctors, and patients that a drug may cause
serious, potentially life-threatening side effects when not used correctly. It
doesn’t mean the medicine shouldn’t be used; it means extra caution is needed
upon prescribing these medications, and patients should be informed before
administering them. Antidepressants carry a BLACK BOX WARNING for
increased suicidal ideation in children, teens, and young adults. Also, over 400 medications carry a BLACK BOX WARNING
with potentially life-threatening side effects. This suggests that if
what you are doing isn’t working, you can ask your doctor about finding a
better option.
One of the most significant LIGHTBULB MOMENTS in my
journey was when I was 15, and a doctor prescribed me LITHIUM for bipolar
disorder. But
I wasn’t bipolar! Looking back, I can honestly say that an
incorrect diagnosis and misuse of lithium initiated a
thirty-year battle with anorexia, bulimia, night-time eating disorder, and
suicidal thoughts. In chapter four, you will learn more about the history
and misconceptions surrounding lithium. When used correctly, lithium offers
anti-suicidal benefits, helps with cognitive decline in dementia, reduces
irritability and impulsivity, decreases oxidative stress, and boosts dopamine
production. However, until doctors evaluate their patients from a functional
psychiatry perspective, including genetics, lifestyle, medications,
nutrition, trauma history, biochemistry, and micronutrient deficiencies,
Psychiatric Polypharmacy will continue as a treatment approach that relies
heavily on medications, hoping to lower the suicide rate while worsening
our mental health crisis.
Tuesday, June 23, 2026
Understanding Trauma-Informed Care- Supporting safety, dignity, and participation!
SAFETY:
What it means: Feeling physically and emotionally safe
What it may look like:
- calm tone of voice
- predictable routines
- clear expectations
- respecting personal space
- Reducing sensory overload
- prepare for transitions
- provide quiet spaces
- minimize sudden changes
- respond calmly during distress
TRUST & TRANSPARENCY
What it means: Consistency and honesty build security
What this may look like:
- following through on promises
- explaining what is happening
- consistent boundaries
- no surprises when possible
- clear communication
- give advance notice of changes
- use simple, honest language
- maintain consistent routines
- check for understanding
CHOICE
What it means: restoring autonomy and control
What this may look like:
- offering options
- respecting preferences
- allowing processing time
- supporting decision-making
- avoiding unnecessary demands
Support Strategies:
- offer two clear choices
- allow time to respond
- use virtual supports if helpful
- honor preferences where possible
COLLABORATION
What it means: working with the person, not doing things to them
What this may look like:
- shared problem-solving
- listening to lived experience
- involving the person in planning
- valuing input from support networks
- respectful teamwork
- ask for input and feedback
- include the person in goal setting
- use collaborative language ("let's","together')
- adapt supports based on feedback
EMPOWERMENT
What it means: building strengths, confidence, and capacity
What this may look like:
- recognizing strengths
- celebrating small successes
- skill-building opportunities
- encouraging independence
- promoting self-advocacy
- focus on strengths first
- teach coping and regulation skills
- encourage choice making
- acknowledge progress
The Biopsychosocial Model: How biology, psychology, and social life shape your health!
YOUR HEALTH HAS THREE PARTS
Eric Arzubi, MD (@drzoobs), Psychiatrist and CEO, Frontier Psychiatry
The Biopsychosocial Model best describes how our health has three parts biology “our body genes, brain, nervous system, infections, other illnesses our psychological “our mind” thoughts and beliefs, emotions like anxiety, sadness, anger, coping habits (exercise, substance use, social media, past trauma), and social “your world” family, friends, work support, money stress, housing, access to care. These three constantly interact.
The Biopsychosocial Model approach looks beyond a
prescription and combines treatment options by addressing the big picture. This,
too, is the objective of my workbook The Road Less Traveled "Are You OK?" The biopsychosocial model expands the
picture so your story and environment count. When care respects all three,
treatment is more likely to fit into your daily life and positively impact your recovery.
ALL ABOUT NEUROTRANSMITTERS
SEROTONIN:
- Regulates mood and emotional balance
- Supports sleep and digestion
- Helps manage stress and anxiety
DOPAMINE:
- Drives motivation and pleasure
- Improves focus and alertness
- Boosts energy and goal-directed behavior
GABA:
- Promotes calm and relaxation
- Reduces overstimulation and anxiety
- Supports deep restful sleep
ACETYLCHOLINE:
- Supports learning and memory
- Aids focus and cognitive performance
- Essential for muscle control and coordination
NOREPINEPHRINE:
- Increases alertness and concentration
- Boosts energy during stress
- Helps balance mood and motivation
GLUTAMATE:
- Key for learning and brain development
- Strengthens memory and neural connections
- Supports overall cognitive function
Wednesday, June 10, 2026
How to get the most out of your doctor visit!!!!!
In this presentation, you will discuss the following tips to get the most out of your doctor visit.
Click on the link below.
https://youtu.be/Hx13CBemzT8?si=-YcXnEj8r0CDqse8
MENTAL HEALTH vs. MENTAL ILLNESS and THE COST OF CONFUSION
MENTAL HEALTH vs. MENTAL ILLNESS
THE COST OF CONFUSION
Sunday, June 7, 2026
What one psychiatrist knew in 1925... we're still learning in 2026!!!!!
WORDS MATTER... more importantly, THE RIGHT WORDS SAVE LIVES!!!
If you know someone struggling with an eating disorder, addiction, or chronic pain, it's important to evaluate the thoughts they are trying desperately to break free from. You will never fully understand their struggle, but you can help them recognize if their treatment plan is working.
If you knew the following words were spoken to your loved one while seeking professional help, would you intervene? Your loved one needs you more than you think they do.
“What is wrong with these kids?”
“If she really wanted to kill herself, why didn't she take more pills?”
“You did a doozy on yourself?”
“She is crazy.”
“Just let her cry and see if she really wants to live.”
Many more...
If you knew this person experienced the following…would you read this article differently?
sexual abuse
rape
losing everything in a house fire
losing her best friend unexpectedly in high school
losing her brother to brain cancer at 29 years old, and his son before he graduated high school
moving 10 times before 30 years old
Her mom suffered from addiction and mental illness
Told to"Just kill yourself already!"
Diagnosis:
Scleroderma
Fibromyalgia
Heart failure
anorexia, bulimia, nighttime eating disorder
Anxiety
OCD
Chronic Pain
PTSD
What continues to save her?
Not popularity
Not money
Not fame
No singular doctor or family member
The answer: Her faith in God!
My workbook, The Road Less Traveled! Are You Okay? is what I consider a love letter from God to me, one that carried me through the darkest times of my life. This workbook provides all the necessary resources in one place to work together with your family, therapist, and god to break free from what is prohibiting you from living your best life!
Thursday, May 28, 2026
Is your nervous system above, within, or below the window of tolerance?
https://www.simplypsychology.org/sympathetic-vs-parasympathetic-nervous-system.html
SIX STEPS TO PROCESS YOUR FEELINGS!
To avoid the pitfall of feeling trapped in the cycle of eating disorders, addiction, loop thinking, or suicidal ideation, it's important to know how to process our feelings. Without the ability to do so, it could take years in therapy and treatment centers to overcome what initially started out as an innocent diet, an attempt to escape reality, or a desire to run away from stress. The following exercise will help you learn to process your feelings by pausing, shifting, and redirecting your energy toward something more constructive and calming.
Tuesday, May 26, 2026
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and Control
What is obsessive-compulsive disorder, or OCD? How is it related to eating disorders, addiction, and suicidal ideation? This post will help you focus on what you can control and remind you of what you can't. The cycle of OCD can only continue when we isolate and try to control the things we have NO CONTROL OVER!
This is what OCD looked like at the lowest point in my life.
OCD created conditions that I continue to overcome to this day.
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is a mental health condition characterized by unwanted thoughts (obsessions) that lead to repetitive behaviors (compulsions).
Greenbrook Mental Wellness Centers
TMS for OCD: An Effective Treatment Option to Relieve Symptoms
Overview of TMS
Sunday, May 24, 2026
ALL THINGS AUTOIMMUNE DISEASE!!!
There are over 100 autoimmune diseases. If you or someone you know has been diagnosed with one this video is a must see! I too was diagnosed with Scleroderma and fibromyalgia in 2009. There is hope!
Through lifestyle medicine the field of treatment is rapidly changing. So, DONT GIVE UP! KEEP FIGHTING FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR LOVED ONES!
Suicide Survivor
God didn't let me break! He showed me my purpose. After four serious attempts to end my life...and as my mom would say, "all you need is the strength of a mustard seed to hear God's message to recognize what has happened to you IS NOT YOUR FAULT. If you are someone who has struggled with addiction, eating disorders, or suicidal ideation, you might be bent, but YOU ARE NOT BROKEN! If you or someone you know is suicidal, there is ALWAYS A WAY OUT! Please call 988 and click on the link below!
DON'T BE A SLAVE TO FEAR! YOU ARE A CHILD OF GOD!
Monday, May 18, 2026
FIBROMYALGIA... IT'S NOT ALL IN YOUR HEAD...But IT IS IN YOUR BRAIN AND CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM
As a patient and advocate for those struggling with chronic pain and trauma, I found the following information helpful for my family to understand my personal struggles with pain. Please advocate for your loved ones and seek a doctor who practices a "BIOPSYCHOSOCIAL" approach. While I will admit I am still learning more about new treatment options myself, I was encouraged and hopeful about new treatment options to live a more comfortable opioid-free life.
https://www.bing.com/videos/riverview/relatedvideo?q=harvard+new+fibromyalgia+findings&&mid=A2FA5C622E75EF249164A2FA5C622E75EF249164&churl=https%3a%2f%2fwww.youtube.com%2fchannel%2fUCiy3rRFqZIxamlMQazA4BYg&mmscn=stvo&FORM=VRDGAR
https://www.bing.com/videos/riverview/relatedvideo?q=harvard+new+fibromyalgia+findings&&mid=A2FA5C622E75EF249164A2FA5C622E75EF249164&churl=https%3a%2f%2fwww.youtube.com%2fchannel%2fUCiy3rRFqZIxamlMQazA4BYg&mmscn=stvo&FORM=VRDGAR
Sunday, May 17, 2026
Where is your pain coming from?
If you knew the root of your pain, what changes would you make to free yourself from it? Watch the attached video and discover the answer for yourself.
As a long time sufferer of debilitating pain, there is a way to live a meaningful life without narcotics. While I do still struggle with debilitating pain, from Raynauds, Scleroderma, Fibromyalgia, and damage I’ve done to my body from anorexia for many decades, doctors are finally onto something.
I hope you will find this information helpful. I pray that you put your health and safety first so you can live a life that is hopefully pain free one day! ❤️❤️❤️
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