"You're the strongest person I know!" and BLACK BOX WARNING...

    

 

 

The cover of my workbook, coming out later this year, features someone many people would not expect to represent the face of suicide. Most people who know me say, “You’re the strongest person I know.” However, what began as an innocent diet at age twelve caused chaos in my life and in the lives of those who loved me for over forty years. My struggle with anorexia, bulimia, addiction, and multiple attempts to end my life was driven by many factors I discuss throughout this workbook, including inadequate treatment, broken relationships, low self-esteem, the entertainment industry, genetics, physical and emotional pain, and the debilitating side effects of medications. In this workbook, you will have the chance to explore each of these topics. I share these experiences not to focus on the past but to help you see that you are not alone in your struggles. We can share these experiences and overcome them together, knowing others have walked a similar path and come out stronger, which can bring comfort and hope on your recovery journey.

Although my story includes hardships and tragic events, my diagnosis of Scleroderma strengthened my relationship with God. My faith has shown me that what or whom we worship depends on our circle of influence and on what we expose our minds and bodies to. When we don’t love ourselves and fall prey to addiction, that addiction becomes our place of worship. As I partnered with God, He gradually removed the things hindering my recovery. Once I identified my recovery needs, there was no turning back. God illuminated my path with what I call “LIGHTBULB MOMENTS.” These moments changed the course of my recovery. God brought people into my life who genuinely cared about my health and well-being. During this time, I worked closely with my insurance provider and naturopathic doctor to evaluate the discovery: several medications I was taking carried a BLACK BOX WARNING, which held me captive in a state of suicidal ideation.

For over 40 years, only one doctor explained what a black-box warning meant. But that wasn’t until I was lying in bed, unable to move my legs because of a reaction to the antibiotic Ciprofloxacin. That reaction led me to quietly research every medication I have been on since puberty. It took me many years of trial and error with different medications to realize that several different medications were fueling my suicidal thoughts and self-destructive behaviors. You will have the opportunity to dive deeper into how your medications have made you feel, so you can avoid the potential side effect of suicidal thoughts that might have been overlooked in the past. Don’t assume your doctor has the answers. You hold the answers to the root of your suffering, which will be revealed in your answers in this workbook.

So, what is a BLACK BOX WARNING? It alerts clients, doctors, and patients that a drug may cause serious, potentially life-threatening side effects when not used correctly. It doesn’t mean the medicine shouldn’t be used; it means extra caution is needed upon prescribing these medications, and patients should be informed before administering them. Antidepressants carry a BLACK BOX WARNING for increased suicidal ideation in children, teens, and young adults. Also,  over 400 medications carry a BLACK BOX WARNING with potentially life-threatening side effects. This suggests that if what you are doing isn’t working, you can ask your doctor about finding a better option.

 One of the most significant LIGHTBULB MOMENTS in my journey was when I was 15, and a doctor prescribed me LITHIUM for bipolar disorder. But I wasn’t bipolar!  Looking back, I can honestly say that an incorrect diagnosis and misuse of lithium initiated a thirty-year battle with anorexia, bulimia, night-time eating disorder, and suicidal thoughts. In chapter four, you will learn more about the history and misconceptions surrounding lithium. When used correctly, lithium offers anti-suicidal benefits, helps with cognitive decline in dementia, reduces irritability and impulsivity, decreases oxidative stress, and boosts dopamine production. However, until doctors evaluate their patients from a functional psychiatry perspective, including genetics, lifestyle, medications, nutrition, trauma history, biochemistry, and micronutrient deficiencies, Psychiatric Polypharmacy will continue as a treatment approach that relies heavily on medications, hoping to lower the suicide rate while worsening our mental health crisis.